What we look for in a Brother/Sister

[BlackQueen]

For the Brothers & Sisters searching for a soul mate,explain what qualities you're looking for.

I will admit,I am very picky when it comes to looking for the right brother to enter my space. A Brother must have the same morals & principles as I do in the liberation of Our People. He must not fear my strength or power as a Black Woman.

[Mtangulizi]

She must know down to the bone that she is Afrikan and nothing else. Ideally a queen who at least holds in high regard Afrikan modes of spirituality. A deeply intellectual sista. A fighting sista who organizes hard, politically hardened, articulate and awake. A dark-skinned sista, pure-bred 100% Afrikan, deep ebony, natural hair. A fit sista of physical and emotional self-discipline, balance and beauty. A sista with the best sense of humor, a beautiful laugh and a hypnotizing smile. A sista that's vegan or very close to that. A sista that knows how to cook and is proud of dat - not like all these cavewomen running around nowadays that pride themselves on being totally ignorant about something as essential and deep and ritualized and spiritual as food preparation (like my two sisters). A sista that deeply loves Afrikans. A sista that isn't a pacifist - would be willing to reload the magazine of my gun in a revolutionary war for me, and throw or launch grenades with me, who studies self-defense and marksmanship. A queen that dances and moves like a true Afrikan. A queen that is in every way musical indeed. A queen I can study with. A queen I can hike in the city or countryside with. A queen I can run with. A queen that's willing to go to Afrika and is totally unafraid of such an adventure/ repatriation. A sista that knows better than to like yt people or keep too many around for friends.

A queen that holds me in chek and never allows me to disrespect, nor allow any of the follies of manhood or masculinity to come out in me.

A queen that loves and respects herself. Who is highly creative. Who is afraid of nothin. Who can think for herself. Who changes and grows all the time in all ways.

This queen would be a rare find indeed. Still lookin though.

[BlackQueen]

My brother,your words are deeply powerful and beautiful. To find anyone like that is indeed a rare treasure. Let us hope the ancestors will bless you with such a love.

[Nefertiti]

BlackQueen....Yes You are...Well me myself looks for one who's clean conscious responsible someone who can tolerate me!!!! Im out going opinionated outspoken Afrocentric not hard to please and loves hard and so on

[WombanAuset]

Intellectual,spiritual (Practices an ATR),family oriented,conscious,for the struggle,positive,well spoken.Honors my queen-dom..as I will honor his king-dom. Into outdoor activities (camping,fishing,swimming,kayaking,walks around the lake). Someone I can wake up with 5 oclock in the morning with and meditate,let's me cook for them ( I love to cook)...Looks i am not concerned with because of the simple fact looks can be changed in an instant...I mean he has to be Black..thats the only requirement lol...Someone I can learn from..as he can learn from me..someone who wants to grow in love..not "fall" into it....
Someone I can be with in a state of ma'at

[Kefentse_Bandele]

I have recentley parted from my beloved queen and find this question to be

most interesting. My problem is I have been entirely to superficial when

selectin' my queen. Does she have locks? Perm? Braids? How many children

she got? DId she read this book? Does she know this elder? I have

approached and dated sistas with yes to all the answers but it still didnt

reflect in their lifestyle and the way we react toward each other. The next

sista that tells me she thinks im a conscious thug i think im gonna committ

suicide...lol Anyways, I need to start building Kefentse and gettin' to know

self before I can be so picky about choosin my "long-term" queen and not

my "temporary" queen!

Uhuru

[Moorish Rebel]

I'm at a point in my life where I think it is best to focus on self and get my ish together before I can truly commit to a relationship. That's not to say that I wont kick it or build with a sista but anything serious, I will hold off on. WombanAuset, you said "someone who wants to grow in love..not "fall" into it...."

This, I have a habit of. I often allow my emotions to get the best of me when I do meet a sista who sparks my interest. I am now learning how to be more mature and African-centered in my approach to a relationship.

BlackQueen, I apologize for going off topic.

[rebelAfrika]

There are only 2 things I look for in a mate. She has to be an African (A black woman from any part of the world) and she has to be a genuinely "good" person. rebelafrika ain't a complicated man. I don't look for "soul mates" though...that's the kind of thing that seems to sneak up on me and find me.

[Kweku_Omowale]

Originally Posted by Kefentse_Bandele

I have recentley parted from my beloved queen and find this question to be

most interesting. My problem is I have been entirely to superficial when

selectin' my queen. Does she have locks? Perm? Braids? How many children

she got? DId she read this book? Does she know this elder? I have

approached and dated sistas with yes to all the answers but it still didnt

reflect in their lifestyle and the way we react toward each other. The next

sista that tells me she thinks im a conscious thug i think im gonna committ

suicide...lol Anyways, I need to start building Kefentse and gettin' to know

self before I can be so picky about choosin my "long-term" queen and not

my "temporary" queen!

Uhuru

true wordz could neva be so spoken bandele!
what caught in ur reply brother,is what u said," it didnt reflect their life styles" wow!
as for me,i try to walk the talk,not only talk,because like an proverb,afrikan proverb says" bea man of action and nota man of words" forgot who said that
somebody mentioned this to me,thats my problem here kenfetse,that i see in the rasta community in toronto,when they talk about jah dis and jah dat,a sister for me,has to be mentally,intellectually and spiritually compatible,in my early years i was busy chasin all kind of women,because hormonal urges lol now,i am learning to control myself,as i grow older and wiser body,mind and soul,i am leaning more and more towards compatability,i dont walk with headwrapz on my head and pretend to be what i am not,for the most part,kenfetse,i have been thru poverty and have lived among my peers and console with dem,afrikan brazilians,living in bowels of amerika,a by product of abandonment,racism and neglect,if there isa soul mate for me,i hope she is somewhere to be seen,as they say," ur other half" has to complement me,in so many ways,heathwise and spiritually,the question in time and place,is that eventhough,for the most of that are conscious,some of dem,as u mentioned become un conscious,sub consciouly,because we live in this MODERN DAY ROME,as people get too confortable with this modern day rome get to offer,big cars,big houses,and the bling bling,thats the beggining of their self destruction,it applies for men and women" bea man of action and nota man of words"

humbly kweku

[Mamazen]

Liberation is a continuous journey.

That said, I want a brother that can continuously grow and evolve with me.

[Kweku_Omowale]

Originally Posted by mamazen

Liberation is a continuous journey.

That said, I want a brother that can continuously grow and evolve with me.

wow@mamazen tru words could neva be so spoken!

wow,this ol afrikan man,is always learning something! those are key words mamazen growth and evolution!

to live functionally in this society is constant struggle,if we dont evolve we regress,you summarize mamazen in two words what afrikan relationship should be all about! medase pa! i know,in toronto,i will be single afrikan man!mamazen,not many people here wants like you mentioned" to grow and evolve" many people are stuck in dogma and same old paradigm,you know
**sadface**

[Kefentse_Bandele]

Originally Posted by Kweku_Omowale

be a man of action and nota man of words"
humbly kweku

And this is what ran off my eldest daughters mother...i was all talk during my late teens and early twenties even though i made small contributions to the struggle. Man a brutha would watch a Khalid tape or Dr. Clarke or like Phil Valentine or sumthin then expect myself and my former queen to change our ways and behavior by the time of the next sun rise.

But im older and smarter now and I dont fear tellin a sista the truth or hearin it from one for that matter!

MY MAIN ADVICE IS LISTEN TO THE ANCESTORS, THEY WILL NOT GUIDE YOU IN THE WRONG DIRECTION!!

Uhuru

[Nesayem]

“Nothing coulda ever really come between us
Share the same room and Jah will feed us." D.Marley

He has to be aware/ conscious/ endarkend however you want to put it. Like sister Nia M. says I have no time for negro-saxons. So when I want to politic on Dr.Afrika and the effects of malt liquor or Dr.Cress-Welsings ideas on penis envy, he's going to be like "Ok I already got you, I bet you didn’t know about this". You should always be able to learn something from a King, if he is truly a King.

He would have to be understanding. I know understanding seems like a very broad term to use but what I’m trying to say is that he'd have to relate to me, my experiences, my goals, and my life plan. We have to share a vision. Two cant walk together unless they agree. If he can’t meet me on that level then the relationship isn’t a REALationship it’s just a lot of faking and frontin’.

I don’t believe a brotha has to work two jobs or be at work 50 hours a week; he just needs to be able to provide for a household. With a job comes a few perks like medical benefits, dental, the ability to purchase things.

Spiritually we would have to share some common ideas because this issue also appears when it relates to raising seeds. Notice I used spirituality opposed to religion, because spiritually goes beyond the church/mosque/ synagogue/ experience.

Dark skin, 6pack abs, athletic build, deep eyes, articulate, funny, outgoing, positive, loving, honesty, compassionate, and being responsive always helps.With that being said Im proud to be Mrs.Revelation.......

[Raha]

What I have searched for, I have found in HER.

Qualities, Traits, etc:

Uncompromising
Open
Maskless
Loving
Genuine
Peaceful
Fiery
Tender
Full of Strength
Intelligent
Poetic
Able to slap whack persons with a single swipe of her hand
Caring
Aqueous
Able to have her mind constantly bud with possibility and growth
No shame in our game
Spiritually fulfilling


A lot of those traits go hand in hand, weave in and out of different contexts, but from those, the gist of my beloved is there.

This is a great topic!

P.E.A.C.E.

[Revelation]

I appreciate a sense of quality she directs into all her efforts, sharing a desire to do well at all that she commits to. She’s aware of her identity as an Afrikan woman. She’s goal oriented and spiritually driven. We have to share a common vision for where we want to be in life. She is a woman I learn from, all the time. She is well read and knowledgeable of many subjects. She balances me having great patience and understanding, spontaneous and creative, accepting and forgiving. She is articulate and fluid in thought; I can follow her ideas to great ends. She is always listening, always attentive, responsive, responsible, caring, and intuitive regarding my needs and wants.

She has an innate desire to please. She is funny, honest, and open to new things; she will allow herself to be loved, and let me place her first in all things. I could go on at length about her for hrs and hrs. She has to be wonderful in many ways, and Nes is all of these things.

Peace,

-R.