How to tell if you've found a single warrior?!

[Jalili]

Originally Posted by akuabarca

just what does an available, focused, rbg soldier look like, exactly?

i wish ya'll brothers would wear an id bracelet.

matter of fact, all single africans, wear your rbg wristband on your right arm. those who wear it on the left, that needs to be reserved for those in relationships.

cuz i can't tell. and it takes too much energy to figure it out.

picture this: sister red sees brother black reading nkrumah at green's bookstore.

sister red thinks brother black is looking strong, serious, conscious, sincere. she likes the way it makes her feel to know he is only a few feet away studying his daily lessons.

she tells herself that he needs to know her and she needs to know him...they're both too beautiful and african to be sitting so close without at least an introduction.

the other side of her says, no chile, don't even look...don't even get your hopes up, he is probably married, or gay, or has a baby with your homegirl, or trying to get you to mess with him behind his queen's back...don't even let your eyes meet.

then back to the first voice in her head...ya'll are africans. what can be wrong with just acknowledging one another?

the other side says please...you have enough bredren to last you a lifetime. enough already with all the platonic male friends. what you really need is a mate.

so, to remain respectful of whatever boundaries she imagines will exist, the opportunity passes and two africans are once again left to sit alone, wasting time trying to figure out how they gone heal their community while being single, knowing that being single ain't even african to begin with.

...when i am an elder, i am going to insist that all the young people in my circle wear that armband. i ain't playing.

we need a universal method to indentify nation builders that are single & serious.

how else are we supposed to build new africa if everybody is crying about not being able to find a mate with complimentary principles?

something has got to be done about this.

This great Idea was thought of by akuabarca and it's a great idea get the word out tell you friends to wear their rbg not only to show pride and power but to let potential mates know that you available!

[Revolutionary_Student]

Great idea and a great story by sistah akuabarca.

[rebelAfrika]

Whatever happened to just asking? Plus sometimes...there's ways you can tell...such as engagement rings and wedding rings.

[Seeking Ma'at]

Originally Posted by rebelAfrika

Whatever happened to just asking? Plus sometimes...there's ways you can tell...such as engagement rings and wedding rings.

...but not everyone--even happily married folks--wears their ring all the time. Some folks opt to not wear a ring at all. *shrug*

[Moorish Rebel]

Originally Posted by Seeking Ma'at

...but not everyone--even happily married folks--wears their ring all the time. Some folks opt to not wear a ring at all. *shrug*

I wonder why....(other than work related issues)

[rebelAfrika]

Originally Posted by Seeking Ma'at

...but not everyone--even happily married folks--wears their ring all the time. Some folks opt to not wear a ring at all. *shrug*

When in doubt...why not ask? Thats what I do. Are you in a relationship? See? It's kinda simple to me.

[Seeking Ma'at]

I'm not sure why folks don't wear their rings. I've never had the nerve to just outright ask, which leads me to rebelAfrika's comment.

Originally Posted by rebelAfrika

When in doubt...why not ask? Thats what I do. Are you in a relationship? See? It's kinda simple to me.

And we are back to the internal debate that sister red has about approaching brother black. It's not that simple for some...not everyone is as outgoing and/or straightforward as you are...lol

[Jalili]

Why ask when you have the info right there for you?

[Elisa Keisha]

ONE second! what happened to just meet other people, that you feel you can relate to, be it for a future friendship, companionship or relationship!!
Sister red should have aproached brother black no matter if he is married or even if she is married herself.

[Sun Ship]

This is interesting. For one, I know many Africans who do not give themselves over to the ring as a sign of marriage (some think it’s a very European cultural fetish). I also know many hardworking people (Black men especially) who do not like wearing their wedding ring most of time even if they are into that as a sign of marriage. Then there is a group of Africans who are not into rings period, and then there are those who like wearing rings and jewelry a lot, and you don’t know if it’s a wedding ring or what.


A ring or RBG wristband is not going to keep people from deceiving another person, let’s be real! Why do you think they call it deceit? And I don’t think we want to start branding married or single brothers like old sick twisted massa’ did with hot irons…

I agree with Sister Elisha, you just have to take the chance and talk to a person, for the power is more so in the questions, not merely the answers.

Respectfully introducing yourself to a Brother is not a crime or indecent in this diasporic African culture, but what comes after the introduction is where most Sisters slip up, Sisters hold back from asking the right questions many times not just merely because they are shy, it’s because they either don’t want to be disappointed or turned down, or they are unknowingly deceiving themselves.

[rebelAfrika]

Originally Posted by Seeking Ma'at

I'm not sure why folks don't wear their rings. I've never had the nerve to just outright ask, which leads me to rebelAfrika's comment.
And we are back to the internal debate that sister red has about approaching brother black. It's not that simple for some...not everyone is as outgoing and/or straightforward as you are...lol

I really don't expect for women to approach me in the first place though. I'm not saying that it's not in a womans nature to be the "aggressor" in a relationship, but I voluntarily take on the role. It's a pleasent surprise when a sister DOES approach me though...but I don't expect it. My daddy taught me lessons about life while we watched national geographic together. Meaning...I learned how to pick up on sisters from watching how lions get down, LMAO!!! For real though...you notice how the male lion walks up to the lioness and they just be staring at each other? Its like they are conversating without talking ("Yeah baby...you should be my baby/cubs mama")..then next thing you know...BOOM!!! They doin' it!!! LMAO!!!

[akuabarca]

i just want to say one small eensy weensy thing.

this idea isn't MY idea...it was placed in my spirit deliberately by my guardian ancestor, who was a queen mother herself, and dealt with relationships and community.

so i have to just tell you, this is what the honored ancestors want us to do.

ps. we have always had social identifiers in our communities, whether it be a particular hair style, the way the headwrap is tied, the tribal marks that are worn, the cloth colors or geometrical design in the weave that linked one to a particular family, or even down to whether a sister wore a shirt or not.

so it ain't nothing new under the sun. it's just up to us to bring it all back when the ancestors say it's time.

[Revolutionary_Student]

Originally Posted by Sun Ship

This is interesting. For one, I know many Africans who do not give themselves over to the ring as a sign of marriage (some think it’s a very European cultural fetish). I also know many hardworking people (Black men especially) who do not like wearing their wedding ring most of time even if they are into that as a sign of marriage. Then there is a group of Africans who are not into rings period, and then there are those who like wearing rings and jewelry a lot, and you don’t know if it’s a wedding ring or what.


A ring or RBG wristband is not going to keep people from deceiving another person, let’s be real! Why do you think they call it deceit? And I don’t think we want to start branding married or single brothers like old sick twisted massa’ did with hot irons…

I agree with Sister Elisha, you just have to take the chance and talk to a person, for the power is more so in the questions, not merely the answers.

Respectfully introducing yourself to a Brother is not a crime or indecent in this diasporic African culture, but what comes after the introduction is where most Sisters slip up, Sisters hold back from asking the right questions many times not just merely because they are shy, it’s because they either don’t want to be disappointed or turned down, or they are unknowingly deceiving themselves.

I have my own strategy when approaching a sista. See, I engage in conversation and NEVER ONCE ask if she is available or not. The idea is that if she's interested in me, she'll jot down my digits or even give me hers. If she has a man, I don't want to know. If she wants me to know, she'll tell me. This way I won't be dissapointed by asking that hot button question and getting the answer I didn't want to hear in the first place.

So as brotha Sun Ship said, "...the power is more so in the questions, not merely the answers."

Don't be stealing my style brothas! Lol!