STOP CALLING ME NIGGA!!! A story of an argument I had with my sibling

[Revolutionary_Student]

Last night I go over my little sister's house to pay a visit. Upon entry, I am greeted by my sister with a "Wassup Nigga?" My sister knows how I am so I don't know if she's just antagonizing me or if she's serious. So I ask her "What you call me?", expecting her realize what she just said to me and correct herself. "Nigga! That's right, we use 'nigga' in this house and if you don't like it go back to your house!"

So I say, respectfully, "All I ask is that you respect me enough to not call me that. Call me by my name or, if you must use a term of endearment, call me brother." So she throws me the old "you didn't used to mind it when people called you nigga years ago" line.

So I flipped the script on her and put her in my shoes, "How'd you like it if I greeted you with 'wassup stank pussy bitch' everytime I see you?"

At this point she is irrate, as she should be. After a 5min exchange of 'nigga' and 'stank pussy bitch' , she kicked me out of her house and I went home wondering if I handled the situation in the right manner. I feel like I got my point across because she was just as offended as I was but she's my sister and now we're not on speaking terms.

How would you have handled the situation? Was I wrong?

[Elisa Keisha]

i think you handled the situation right. she may be able to think about it while you "dont talk to echother" and if she doesnt come back at you, you can come back at her in some time and just be cool. which doesnt mean you tell her you are sorry or allow her to call you out of ur name.

[Kefentse_Bandele]

Originally Posted by Revolutionary_Student

Last night I go over my little sister's house to pay a visit. Upon entry, I am greeted by my sister with a "Wassup Nigga?" My sister knows how I am so I don't know if she's just antagonizing me or if she's serious. So I ask her "What you call me?", expecting her realize what she just said to me and correct herself. "Nigga! That's right, we use 'nigga' in this house and if you don't like it go back to your house!"

So I say, respectfully, "All I ask is that you respect me enough to not call me that. Call me by my name or, if you must use a term of endearment, call me brother." So she throws me the old "you didn't used to mind it when people called you nigga years ago" line.

So I flipped the script on her and put her in my shoes, "How'd you like it if I greeted you with 'wassup stank pussy bitch' everytime I see you?"

At this point she is irrate, as she should be. After a 5min exchange of 'nigga' and 'stank pussy bitch' , she kicked me out of her house and I went home wondering if I handled the situation in the right manner. I feel like I got my point across because she was just as offended as I was but she's my sister and now we're not on speaking terms.

How would you have handled the situation? Was I wrong?

You definitely handled it wrong brutha...lol

That's your sister, always and you maybe should try to win her over with love.

I went through the same thing with my siblings and now, years later...lol, they will kill someone for callin me nigga even though they still use it themselves.

My brother actually confronted our cousin about callin me a nigga.

Call your sister, tell her you luhv her and just keep teaching her and be patient because including your sister and mines, many are called but few are chosen!

Uhuru & Umoja!

[John P.]

Originally Posted by Kefentse_Bandele

You definitely handled it wrong brutha...lol

That's your sister, always and you maybe should try to win her over with love.

I went through the same thing with my siblings and now, years later...lol, they will kill someone for callin me nigga even though they still use it themselves.

My brother actually confronted our cousin about callin me a nigga.

Call your sister, tell her you luhv her and just keep teaching her and be patient because including your sister and mines, many are called but few are chosen!

Uhuru & Umoja!

yeah i agree. I think you shoulda just simply said "I see no niggas here, I'm your brother and you know my name". If you respond that way everytime then as time pass she'll get the message and stop greeting you with nigga. It beats getting kicked out and not speaking for a minute. Plus, what you said to her was equal to the N-word and 1/2 in her mind, prolly.

[Elisa Keisha]

Originally Posted by John P.

yeah i agree. I think you shoulda just simply said "I see no niggas here, I'm your brother and you know my name". If you respond that way everytime then as time pass she'll get the message and stop greeting you with nigga. It beats getting kicked out and not speaking for a minute. Plus, what you said to her was equal to the N-word and 1/2 in her mind, prolly.

well what i see is She got mad. maybe next time you can handle it wth love. but one thing im sure too...she will finally understand someday if you keep trying.

[Jalili]

Well I think you handled it the way it needed to be handled, You asked her not to call you that a first then she followed up with "we use nigga in this house" and you just made her see exactly how it made you feel when she say it to you by saying the equivalent to her in return.

Maybe next time love will be the answer but as of this time you hand to get the point across and it may take a while for it to resonate with her but things will be better next time you meet.

[Revolutionary_Student]

Asante for all of your input, comrades! I love y'all. I'll use love from now on, as suggested. Eventually, it will sink in and she'll stop calling me nigga... I hope.

I can't keep calling her wut I called her in retaliation because that'll make for a toxic relationship. I can only hope that wut I called her will stick in her head the next time she fixes her mouth to address me as nigga.

[Revolutionary_Student]

I guess she's over it now because she just called me to ask for a ride to work. Lol! Unfortunately for her I was already at work.

[G.O.D.F.A.T.H.A.]

Let me take her so I can see if she calls me a nigga or a negro.

[JemChi]

Originally Posted by Revolutionary_Student

Last night I go over my little sister's house to pay a visit. Upon entry, I am greeted by my sister with a "Wassup Nigga?" My sister knows how I am so I don't know if she's just antagonizing me or if she's serious. So I ask her "What you call me?", expecting her realize what she just said to me and correct herself. "Nigga! That's right, we use 'nigga' in this house and if you don't like it go back to your house!"

So I say, respectfully, "All I ask is that you respect me enough to not call me that. Call me by my name or, if you must use a term of endearment, call me brother." So she throws me the old "you didn't used to mind it when people called you nigga years ago" line.

So I flipped the script on her and put her in my shoes, "How'd you like it if I greeted you with 'wassup stank pussy bitch' everytime I see you?"

At this point she is irrate, as she should be. After a 5min exchange of 'nigga' and 'stank pussy bitch' , she kicked me out of her house and I went home wondering if I handled the situation in the right manner. I feel like I got my point across because she was just as offended as I was but she's my sister and now we're not on speaking terms.

How would you have handled the situation? Was I wrong?

You handled the situation how you felt you should have handled it. Im not you so I cant say whether you were wrong or not, we all nut up every now and then when we feel weve been offended. If it was something that I felt strongly about, Im sure I would react in MY OWN SPECIAL WAY As individuals we have to be responsible for our own actions and we cant let other people get us all fired up (please believe im still working on this myself) cause then we get down on there level. So some times we have to let shit ride, pick and choose our battles (..again Im still workn on this myself, lol). I have gotten to the point where I dont want to be called a nigga and vice versa, but my brothas still use it and they even use it when talking to me. Im not about to battle with them all the time over its usage, my relationship with them as Fam is way deeper and Ill get over it. Folks come into 'consciousness' at different points in there lives, some dont even make it, so I can only control me and let other folk deal with them..

[JemChi]

I guess she's over it now because she just called me to ask for a ride to work. Lol! Unfortunately for her I was already at work.

See it wat'n even that deep..

[Kefentse_Bandele]

Originally Posted by Revolutionary_Student

Asante for all of your input, comrades! I love y'all. I'll use love from now on, as suggested. Eventually, it will sink in and she'll stop calling me nigga... I hope.

I can't keep calling her wut I called her in retaliation because that'll make for a toxic relationship. I can only hope that wut I called her will stick in her head the next time she fixes her mouth to address me as nigga.

Whats gonna be the real shocker is how she defends you when someone outside of her calls u a nigga in her presence!!

[BlackQueen]

No,brother. Respect works both ways,you don't use that word,but she does. However,she knows how you are,and did it out of spite,because she believes that it's acceptable to use the N word. She may even believe that because you are a revolutionary,that you are above her,which you are,because your mind is free.You did the right thing,but ask yourself,do you want to educate her about the revolution or let her be who she is,and figure it out on her own?

Originally Posted by Revolutionary_Student